-the blowhole of true evil-

This blowhole features all flavors of things evil. The Ventures (see below) have volunteered to play sentinel to prevent any miscreants from returning after they have been expelled. Thus The Ventures are not in themselves evil; they are in fact the opposite, a black and white reverb quintet of righteousness, confining the beast(s) via the property of the flaming Mosrite guitar, Gretsch highhat, and etc.

Beginning ejection process: 5...4...

Meet the unsavory "Lobster Zone"

The Lobster Zone is an arch-example of humanity's lack of style. This sacriligeous machine holds a number of lobsters captive in its watery payload, hoping to entice humans to pop in a 5 spot and "fish" for a meal. Listen to the advertising propaganda: "Grab New Profits! An Exciting, Crowd Pleasing Sport." This is one of the most unsavory schemes we've ever encountered! Imagine: a human in a pants-suit approaches the Lobster Zone feeling hungry, flushed. Human inserts a bill in the changer with glee. Human pilots the claw over the oblivious lobsters, who are milling about themselves. The claw drops, it sinks, it begins to close, however the lobster in the claw has become alarmed, and attempts to jet backwards. The human chuckles! A crowd has assembled, pleased by this novel new sport! Does the claw know when to close and when to falter? The claw does not think; it closes. The thinking human extends the unthinking claw to do its unsavory bidding; the lobster arrives in the tray with its claws bound. Where did humanity go wrong? Our souls will be eternally blackened by the fallout from this karmic disaster.


the cremesicle sinkhole | sour lime | anonymous berry | artificial banana